Think of the most successful people you know or wish you know. There’s something about their lives that you envy but it may feel entirely out of reach in your own life. What if I told you that YOU have high likelihood of success, too? By successful, I mean you can successfully create the life you want. It turns out that success is much more attainable than most people realize. There are three traits I’ve discovered are common among successful people and you may share these traits. You are poised to successfully create the life you want, too!
1. Their drive is greater than their talent.
Think about successful people you know. Are they talented? Probably. But there are people likely more talented than them, but they have determination to create the lives they want. This drives motivation and commitment that ultimately leads to success. There will always be people more talented than you but what makes you more likely to succeed comes down to unwavering belief that you deserve success and doing everything you can to make it happen. Most people will never achieve their full potential because they don’t believe they deserve it. Believe that you deserve it and put the work in to make it happen.
Steve Martin is one of the most beloved comedians, actors and filmmakers. He’s very talented but so are many others who failed to achieve the same level of success. His successful comes down to his drive. As a child, Steve decided he wanted a wildly successful career. He performed and honed his stand-up routines a dozen times per week before the age of 20. When he failed, he learned.
“I did stand-up comedy for eighteen years,” Steve wrote in his book, “Born Standing Up.” “Ten of those years were spent learning, four years were spent refining, and four were spent in wild success.”
Be grateful for failure and keep going.
2. They experienced extremely tough stuff in life.
It knocks me over when successful people describe the challenges they faced in their lives. How is it possible they want through hell and not only survived but achieved a life others envy? AMAZING! There’s nothing more inspiring than the people who bravely decided to overcome those challenges and achieve their goals to create the lives they want.
Adult children of alcoholics like me spent most of our lives convinced that successful people had an upper hand in life Adult children of alcoholics like me spent most of our lives convinced that successful people had an upper hand in life because they came from a healthier family. I always thought that achieving success is easier for everyone else because they have both greater talent and fewer issues than me. Turns out that’s bologna. All have issues and some have very little talent but abundant belief.
Media icon Oprah Winfrey has been open about her difficult childhood marked by poverty and physical and sexual abuse. She decided early on that she was destined for a different life than that of her family, and she made it happen by inspiring millions of people worldwide. She is like the many successful people I’ve met over the years who rejected the “bad cards” mindset. The “bad cards” mindset occurs when people experience tough stuff such as growing up with an alcoholic parent and feel they were dealt bad cards in life and, as a result, will never have the life they want.
How I see it is you have two options if you experienced extremely tough stuff in life: Follow the same path as the people around you or go in the entirely opposite direction with determination to make a much better life happen and never give up the pursuit. It’s not possible to walk both paths; if you still have one foot on the well-beaten path of your family, you can’t move forward with your own path.
3. They are the committed to the art of discipline.
Successful people don’t claim to have everything figured out. In fact, they are open about the constant learning journey. They celebrate the chance to be committed to something that is bigger than themselves, and they learn and pivot and do better.
Chris Ilitch runs his family’s globally successful Little Caesars pizza chain and other companies. He said people often comment that his family hit the lottery with the success of their businesses. But the truth is, he explained, their success had nothing to do with luck and everything to do with his family’s commitment to discipline and determination.
Likewise, Canadian Olympic medalist Leah Pells found hope in running as she coped with the effects of her mother’s alcoholism. I’m a fan of Leah’s memoir, “Not About the Medal.” Growing up, Leah redirected focus on the pain and fear from that experience into becoming a top athlete, and repeatedly set and achieved goals that pushed herself farther than critics said she could.
When you’re different enough to believe you can achieve something remarkable, you will.
There you go! These are the three things you’d never guess about successful people who created the lives they want. It’s about time you started thinking of yourself as a successful person. You are just as likely to create the life you want, even when the odds are against you, as the people who’ve already done it. Let’s do this!
