Have you ever felt like you were “walking on eggshells” or “waiting for the next bad thing to happen”? Are you always “going the extra mile” and doing everything you can possibly do to help avoid something bad happening? This is called being hypervigilant. Unfortunately, it is something many adult children of alcoholics experience every day, and it can keep serenity at bay.
If you struggle with hypervigilance symptoms as an adult child of an alcoholic, there is good news: you don’t have to experience the effects of hypervigilance forever. With the right resources, you can find support and healing. Here are the steps that helped me recognize and reduce my own hypervigilance:
1. Get Educated About Addiction and Adult Children of an Alcoholic Syndrome
An important part of overcoming hypervigilance is understanding why you’re experiencing it. Take the time to become educated about the effects of addiction and Adult Children of an Alcoholic Syndrome. Unfortunately, children who have grown up with addiction in the home often struggle with hypervigilance throughout their early years and as they grow older, and understanding this can give you the context you need as you seek to overcome it.
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2. Learn How to Set and Stick to a Healthy Routine
Unfortunately, hypervigilance in adult children of alcoholics is often the result of the instability and chaos that we experienced as children. Learning to create and stick to healthy routines can help you ease the symptoms of hypervigilance as you learn to feel at peace and know what to expect in your day-to-day life. Don’t be afraid to use a planner and stick to a healthy schedule. Little efforts like these can make a big difference.
3. Focus on Self-Care
One of the best things you can do as you seek to overcome hypervigilance is focusing on self-care. Filling your cup will allow you to bring your best self to the table as you work to overcome hypervigilance. Take time to try something new or dedicate time to a hobby you already enjoy. Be sure to eat well, exercise and get enough sleep. Focusing on self-care can give you the strength you need as you tackle the challenges of hypervigilance.
4. Get Into Therapy Focused on Trauma Recovery
Therapy is another crucial part of hypervigilance treatment. Your therapist can provide helpful insights, support and guidance throughout your healing journey, as well as identify harmful thought patterns that might be contributing to what you’re experiencing. Be sure to look for a therapist who specializes in trauma recovery. Often, therapists who have this experience are best equipped to help with your unique struggles.
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5. Never Stop Your Healing Journey
Finally, if you’re struggling with the effects of hypervigilance, remember to never give up. As adult children of alcoholics, it’s normal to struggle with hypervigilance, and healing takes time and effort. The important part is to keep trying!
The symptoms of hypervigilance have manifested themselves in every aspect of my life as an adult child of an alcoholic. In my career, I became a workaholic because I was constantly terrified of letting my coworkers down and losing my job. In my friendships, I was heavily guarded at first to avoid getting hurt. In my romantic relationships, I carefully built the tallest walls around my heart to avoid getting hurt. It was easier to avoid committed relationships entirely because I was afraid of falling in love and then losing that person.
Through my healing and recovery process, I’ve dramatically lessened my hypervigilance. It is still part of who I am but now I don’t walk on eggshells. If I can do it, you can, too.
Best wishes to you in your healing journey.
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