Thinking of you

It is 1 pm on a weird Memorial Day and keying words to you is a welcome sense of familiarity.

If you have been following along for years, hi. If you are among the many who recently landed on JodyLamb.com while seeking to understand what all this adult child of an alcoholic stuff is all about and how it affects your life today, hi. I’m checking in to say hi and let you know I’m thinking of you.

I hope you are healthy and safe.

Around March 1, everything about my predictable job and life flipped upside down when COVID-19 began making its way around the U.S. Three months have passed at lightning speed because I work in health care communications. Thinking back on hopeful Jody in January 2020 makes me laugh; I’d like to have a conversation like the one in this clever Julie Nolke skit.

I wish I could detail all the ways I have stayed on course with my healthy-living and healing journey during this crazy period but the truth is, the first few months of the pandemic challenged what I’ve learned about taking good care of me.

As an adult child of an alcoholic, I am uniquely positioned to take on stressful, unpredictable situations. I am also uniquely positioned to take on too much responsibility and quickly abandon self-care activities during a crisis of this magnitude. Yes, that’s how the last three months have gone. But I’m giving myself a big, that’s-okay, because, well, we’re in a flipping global pandemic!

Long before the media covered it, I saw the predictions during meetings at work and they stunned me – e.g. the numbers of people who would lose their lives to COVID-19, the way the virus would mutate, how the symptoms would change. I also saw fear on the faces usually calm executive leaders. For several weeks, I stopped eating and sleeping and worked 16 hours/day. It has been meaningful, albeit difficult and stressful work.

In the early days, like health care workers on the front line, I struggled with not wanting to terrify the people I love while also wanting to give them all the information, so they would understand the seriousness of the situation and follow the CDC guidelines. It is not easy to be in the know.

A few weeks ago, after working every day since early March, I finally slowed down and began to think. This may sound strange, considering that many people have had abundant time sit and think as they have been quarantined at home, but I’ve been too busy to really stop and process anything. I do not remember large chunks of the last few months. I have no memory of certain projects and things I wrote.

I’ve seen a lot of good in humans through all of this crazy stuff, as I wrote here:

View this post on Instagram

Thank you. Yes, I’m thanking you. I work in health care communication. I know all about the heroes on the COVID-19 front line and the many others working long hours and solving challenges to support them behind the scenes. They are extraordinary. Through this crisis, you’ve inspired me the most. Non-healthcare people in communities have come together to help each other. People are volunteering by the thousands, donating what they can, sewing face masks, checking on their neighbors, sending a note to an old friend just to say hi, writing messages of support in hospital parking lots and little kids are writing thank you letters to doctors and nurses that are so touching, those docs and nurses carry them in their pockets to remind them why they’re doing this. I worked every day for the last 8 weeks and haven’t had a chance to tell you until now: Thank you for everything you’ve done through the pandemic. When you’re quarantined in your home, it’s tough to see how much you’ve touched. But your words and your outreach have made this pandemic situation better for someone – likely many people. Your generosity, compassion and sense of humor are powerful. Never underestimate your influence, even over something that feels so out of our control.

A post shared by JODY LAMB (@jodymlamb) on May 3, 2020 at 6:54pm PDT

So, here I am now thinking and wondering how you are doing. I am also praying for the children and people who now must spend more time in unhealthy homes with toxic environments and relationships because of the stay-at-home orders – yet it is necessary for the pandemic. Like many adult children of alcoholics, I loathe when problems feel so out of my control. I want to find the solution or create it if it doesn’t exist. I want this all to be a memory already!

Through this crisis, I’ve thought so much about my dad and wish I could have just one conversation with him – to hear his thoughts and his humor. He always knew just what to say and to make complicated situations simpler, so they made sense.

My favorite thing my dad ever said was this: “Unquestionably, we should all seek to leave the world in better balance to the best of our abilities, somehow, some way, prior to jumping on the Bonnie Boat and sailing way.”

So, I take comfort in knowing what he would tell me through the pandemic. He would tell me to give the world better balance as we create a new future.

People are so full of fear and anxiety and are going through something none of us have ever experienced. It is easy to feel like the problem is too big for you to make any difference. But we all have skills and experience that make us uniquely positioned to give different types of good – even if it’s as simple as making someone laugh.

Thank you for all you do to give the world better balance.

If you’re going through an exceptionally hard time, please let people help you. This, too, shall pass.

Be well and keep taking good care of you.