I’ve had another ACoA healing journey epiphany. 10 years into this, I am still learning!
I read an article a few weeks ago about research related to parents who have a child diagnosed with a life-changing disease are being diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) as a result of the trauma. This was an unusual article because most of the mainstream media coverage of PTSD is tied to people who served in the military.
Afterward, I thought about specific events and the general trauma I experienced between the ages of 21 and 25 years old when my mother’s substance use disorder was at the worst point of our lives. On this blog and my YouTube channel, I have not shared much about how my brain was being programmed to think a certain way during this time because I did not realize I was still being shaped at that point!
I thought my adult child of an alcoholic traits (such as anxiety, lack of satisfaction with myself, trust issues, people pleasing, etc.) were tied only to my experiences as a child and teenager. I did not realize that the trauma in my family during my 20s was doubling-down on how my brain had learned to work in my earlier years.
So, what does acknowledgement that I experienced trauma as an adult mean? It proves you can program your brain, no matter your age. The person I am today is almost unrecognizable from 26-year-old, very depressed me. Our brains are designed to learn and adapt for survival. I believe acknowledging all your experiences, at all the points you lived them, is so important to identifying what you need to do to heal and to give confidence that just like negative experiences changed your brain, positive changes to your environment, habits and hope can create the life you want.
Remember, your only job in life is to take good care of you.
Jody Lamb is an author, blogger and adult child of an alcoholic on a journey to create an awesome grownup life. Visit JodyLamb.com. Twitter and Instagram: @JodyMLamb. YouTube: /JodyLamb. Facebook.com/JodyLambAuthor. Subscribe for free access to my newsletter:
Here is the video version of this post:
You’re so strong and brave!
Thank you so much!
I think that a lot of people experience the same situation you described when you weren’t aware that your behavior was still being shaped between the ages of 21 and 25. Some of my friends deny this even if their current situation with their parents or partners affects their lives greatly. Seeing this happen so often encourages me to be a certified therapist for trauma therapy.
Hi Jody, fellow survivor of childhood trauma here. Thank you for talking about your experience. The more of us speak up, the easier it will be for others to understand their experience and start to heal xxx
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Thank you for sharing your powerful insight and personal journey. Acknowledging the trauma experienced in our adult years is a crucial step towards healing and understanding how our brains can be shaped at any age!
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