Stress is a part of life but it’s how we manage it that makes all the difference.
On this journey of creating the life I want and deserve, one of the greatest challenges is how to more effectively manage stress.
As an adult child of an alcoholic, and like other people who grew up in dysfunctional environments, stress and anxiety is as familiar as breathing.
Over the years, I’ve learned there are 5 key things that help me more effectively manage stress and reduce anxiety.
When I stop doing these 5 things, there’s a terrible domino effect. I make one bad decision after another. That’s when the stress and anxiety reach a nearly unmanageable point.
It’s important to note that everyone is different; you should discuss your needs with a mental health professional.
5 ways to better manage stress
1. Get 6-7 hours of sleep every night.
This is the hustle generation. Sleep is completely undervalued. 10 years ago, I remember telling someone that I averaged only 5 hours of sleep every night. It wasn’t uncommon. Social media feeds detailed “I’ll sleep when my I dead” and boasts from entrepreneurs who pulled all-nighters. I was tough and I didn’t need sleep, even though I was completely depressed and paralyzed by anxiety. Then I learned the science behind sleep and my mind my blown. If you haven’t read Arianna Huffington’s book about sleep, The Sleep Revolution, you should do it.
Since then, I have discovered a direct correlation between sleep (or lack of) and my high anxiety, ability to manage stress and overall sense of happiness. When I get 7 hours or more of sleep, I am significantly more on my A-game. I am calmer. I make better decisions. I am a better writer, leader, friend, sister, daughter, problem solver, neighbor, dog and cat mom and human being!
Considering that I have long been a night owl, ensuring that I get 7 hours of sleep takes significant effort. I’ve reduced screen time, re-arranged my nightly routines and focused time management to ensure I am in bed and asleep at a certain time. Walks, chamomile tea, meditation, reading, journaling, prayer and melatonin are among the things that help me squash anxiety and help me drift off into sleep for 7 hours.
2. Prioritize self-care.
In my professional and personal life, people rely on me for many things. With so many responsibilities to juggle, the first client to drop off my list is, of course, me. Put yourself first is not something that comes naturally for me because I spent my whole life putting myself last.
When I work late into the night, and put my work above my own well-being, the dominoes fall. I don’t get enough sleep. I skip meals or eat unhealthy food. I am exhausted. Anxiety wraps its strong arms around me.
3. Get outside and walk.
Science says it’s true: Being outside and walking elevates your mood. For me, there is nothing more relaxing and centering than taking a slow walk with Rocco, my dog. This is different from exercising. This is simply being in touch with the sun and the fresh air. It does something very good to my brain.
4. Be a list writer.
One of the worst feelings in the world is being overwhelmed. I am an ardent believer in the power of lists for my professional and personal life.
At work, I juggle projects with competing priority. I would not be able to function without a daily list of the 5 things I absolutely must get done no matter what. In my personal life, a list helps me make decisions and manage my time so that I can continue taking good care of myself and building the life that I want and deserve.
5. Make friends with good words.
This has been and will continue to be a lifelong tool for managing stress.
When I was growing up in a dysfunctional environment, I escaped with books that transported me to other worlds. I also wrote screenplays because it gave me the ability to solve problems in a way I couldn’t in my real life. I wrote in journals. I found such relief in sharing the feelings I bottled up and the problems I hid from the world.
When the internet came along, I discovered more ways to consume words – social media, podcasts and audiobooks. I found such inspiration in the words of other people!
Today, I consume and share words in these multiple ways every day. Second to sleep, there is nothing more cathartic and inspiring for me than this. Go get yourself some good words and block out the words that bring you down.
6. Say no.
When I overcommit myself to other people and responsibilities, there is no time and energy left over for what is good for me and what I enjoy doing. Be realistic about your available time. Say no. This is not easy, especially for people pleasers like yours truly. But since you know your only job in life is to take good care of yourself, you must learn to do this.
I hope you are actively building the life you want and deserve.