When you grow up in a dysfunctional environment, the odds of having a great grownup life are against you. But how you grew up doesn’t define your future. You and I have the power to create it.
My mother has a substance use disorder. The effects of her alcoholism deeply affected me. Also, addiction runs deep in both my father and mother’s families….generation after generation, the cycle continued.
So, according to science, the odds are very high that I will develop a substance use disorder myself and/or that I would suffer as an adult with many struggles due to growing up in a dysfunctional environment and family.
Thanks, science.
The same goes for children of parents with mental illness and others who experienced tough times.
So you and I am grow up and have a perpetual backpack filled with giant rocks. And we’re trying to build a life with that weight on our shoulders. It makes getting shit done much more difficult. It is way harder to create that life.
So, yeah, other people who grew up in healthier environments with stability and predictability, do not have that backpack with rocks. They did not experience the trauma. They have an advantage and the odds of a great life are better for them.
But here’s the thing – you and I have seen the bad and the pain. We know what’s down that road. You and I are fortunate enough to recognize that we have the freedom to venture on an unfamiliar, healthier road. We are free to heal, to recover, to grow and to create and thrive in an awesome life. See, we have the wisdom and the power to make it happen.
We want the good life more than the people with the better odds.
When you get educated, when you live by the truth that your only job in life is to take good care of you, when you heal, when you focus on you, the rocks drop out of that backpack.
I hope you are well in your journey.
Jody Lamb is an author, blogger and adult child of an alcoholic on a journey to create an awesome grownup life. Visit JodyLamb.com. Twitter and Instagram: @JodyMLamb. YouTube: /JodyLamb. Facebook.com/JodyLambAuthor.
Jody, your message is inspiring. It’s a powerful reminder that our past doesn’t define our future. We have the strength to overcome our upbringing and build a better life. Your journey and insights are truly motivating. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and positivity.